Weightman was coaching the Richmond side in the annual Auslab Legends Cup, which was a curtain-raiser to last Saturday’s Round 14 clash between the Tigers and Melbourne at the MCG.
Unfortunately for ‘Flea’, the Dunne-coached Auslab team proved far too strong, winning the match by more than 50 points.
Flea, however, delved into his excuse bag to extract some tangible reasons why his charges had come up short on the day . . .
“They had five extra players for three quarters,” bemoaned Flea.
“We were hit badly by injuries, but the Assistant Commissioner of Police, Emmett Dunne, simply refused to compromise and ensure a fair competition.
“He kept a full team out there right throughout the game, so what chance did we have!
“At three-quarter time, we actually had to call on two Club staff members, who were helping organise the event - Richard Baker and Ryan Key - along with one of our trainers - Kevin Rigg - to pull the boots on and fill in for us.”
Flea then provided a concise summary of some of his players’ efforts in the match, along with a few of the opposition’s.
“Our CEO, Brendon Gale, who was playing for the Richmond side, lasted just 22 seconds in last year’s match after Greg Stafford made light contact with him at the opening bounce ruck contest. This time, he lasted until half-time, but, to be honest, he might as well have gone off after 22 seconds, such was his impact, or lack of it.
“Michael Roach (Richmond side), who couldn’t make the distance from 20 metres out last year, showed significant improvement - he can now kick the ball nearly 20 metres!
“Paul Pavlovski (Richmond side), our local hotelier, pumped himself up to anyone, who would listen pre-game about his football prowess, but he lasted just 10 minutes after receiving a very soft tackle.
“Samuel Catlin (Auslab side), who was dressed in his customary full Tiger gear, including Yellow and Black dreadlock hat, kicked a fantastic goal, and also missed a sitter.
“Michael Mitchell (Auslab side) showed he’s still mighty quick and slick.
“And, Peter Wilson is still full of it . . .”
The Terry Smith Medal for best player in the Auslab team went to Brett Vorhauer, and the Peter Welsh Medal, for the best player in the Richmond team went to the CEO of Clive Peeters, Nik Papa.
